On The Rocks
by Quarter 'till Class
Summary: "I wouldn't mind." She's looking at him, watching Kirito's every movement from her place beside Klein. She closes her eyes into a somber smile. His throat is dry. He takes a rushed sip of his drink and finds that gin only worsens the feeling. He doesn't look at her for a very long moment...and when he does, she's composed herself. "Not a bit," she says. Klein x Kirito


**Disclaimer: All and any Sword Art Online** **champion names belong to** **Reki Kawahara.** **No OC's are included within this work, indicating that nothing is claimed or owned by the author, Quarter 'till Class. No copyright infringement is intended. Plagiarism is theft so is prohibited. Do not copy or create a reproduction of this work in any language without** **express written authorization of the author, Quarter 'till Class. Thank you. Please enjoy.**

 _ **Klein x Kirito**_

 **Warnings: Violence, sexual implications, murder, weaponry, blood. Trigger warning.**

A/N: I'm going to be honest. I didn't like Sword Art Online much. Or maybe at all. SAO II was pretty good, but the first season was just terrible. Asuna had so much potential, Kirito was a typical, over-glorified hero, and Klein (one of the most rich and hilarious characters) was cast aside for the sake of a gaudy romance. However, this was requested, and I'd love to work on it more simply because I loved the idea of the pairing.

* * *

 **Chapter One: Women**

* * *

The girl in front of him wrings her hands and sets them about her coffee. Beautiful, intelligent, generous, and perhaps a dash of funny. Add a bit of exposed skin to slightly sexualize the mood, and you have the perfect date. Her father comes from wealth and she's the only child. She says she's attending the local college and studying in nursing. How quaint.

So here they were, staring at their respective drinks, uninterested. Because Klein was bored. And she could tell.

She smiled at him, feigning politeness, pulling her purse against her a bit defensively as she stood. The glassware rattled and a napkin fell on the floor when she finally walked away. He supposed she wasn't used to rejection. Could he even define what'd just occurred as rejection? She just kept talking. Her mouth kept opening and each time he'd listen to a lackluster slur regarding the coffee or his appealing demeanor.

He'd asked her out, and then realized that she was far below his continuously building expectations. All women were, anymore. There's lipstick on the edge of her mug, caked on as thick as icing. He sits back in his chair and tips it, arms lax and eyes directed at the traffic outside. A woman scolds one child while pushing the stroller of the other. The binky is thrown on the concrete by tiny, meaty fists before it's forgotten entirely.

He considers running out and grabbing it before she's out of sight. But it'd be thrown out, either way.

He had a date tomorrow with the girl that shares the same mailbox row in his complex. A second that evening with a classmate. And another on Thursday with some American girl named Veronica. He doesn't even recall where they met. In fact, he doesn't actually care. He grimaces to express his distaste.

Why did he come here? He hates coffee.

* * *

Agil asks him if everything is alright. Klein grins and tells him that the ladies have been pouring in, which, is not entirely untruthful. Saying that he can't decide within the luxurious wave of gorgeous eyed damsels is perhaps a fib. Saying that he enjoyed their company was a complete and utter lie. Agil has been married long enough. He smiles as he cleans out a glass with a rag, shifting his gaze to his other patrons.

Asuna has been talking for an hour. Kirito hasn't been listening for just as long. She touches his arm and he muddles his way back into reality, grin sheepish.

The bar was fairly full tonight. He hated stale evenings.

"So how did the date go?"

Klein doesn't say anything.

* * *

Veronica is fairly horrid. Her colored contacts are atrocious and her attitude is foul. He wonders what he was thinking (or perhaps how drunk he was) when he invited her to lunch. At one point he sighs and stops responding. And at another, she calls him a misogynistic pig and leaves him with the bill, despite not having finished her food. He orders a fancy little cake and the waiter says it's "on the house", having been witness to the atrocity that was a very awful American woman.

They fist-bump and Klein asks if he'd like to catch a movie.

His name is Mikael and he's a fourth year international student from (surprise, surprise) America. He's studying in business (that's original), plays VRMMORPGs, and prefers a less dominant role in...other activities. Klein has no issues with that whatsoever.

They maintain something between serious and fun for four months. Or maybe it was something friendly with unusual benefits. Because going to the gym together, studying together, and then having sex wherever is apparently a little unusual. He tells Agil that it's not that weird. Agil truly thinks otherwise.

When Mikael asks why he hasn't met Klein's friends, virtually or in reality, he says that it'd be "sort'a intolerable". And after one last evening of physical frustration and forgiveness, they agree to go their separate ways.

And that evening alone (romantically spent with a bowl of instant ramen) is the first time in which Klein realizes he may prefer men.

* * *

"Asuna and Kirito have decided to be friends." Agil is rounding a glass with a rag, tone monotonous. It almost seems as though he never stopped.

"Oh. Friends?" He lifts his chin from his hand at the news, unaffected otherwise. He's taken a liking to harder liquors and Agil is far from oblivious to the fact. The quantity has increased as well.

"Just friends," he says.

"That's too bad. Their babies would have been cute." Klein has an imaginative smile stretched across his face. A sort of distant expression at the thought of orange haired infants dual-wielding.

"You're not interested?" He makes a sour face out of misunderstanding.

"Asuna's nice and all, but I'd never-"

"In Kirito."

He blinks. His mouth is dry. He presses for another glass of anything on the rocks and Agil sets the unappealing reality of a cup of water on the bar.

His scowl vanishes and he recovers his nonchalant demeanor. "Pft. Against all that competition? Liz. Silica. Sinon. Hell, even Leafa."

"Married. In love. Moved on. Dating."

"Liz married that guy? I just saw her last week!" He runs a hand of disbelief though his hair. A bit of water splashes from the cup and he grimaces at the dampness of his shirt.

"Engaged, actually. Last weekend he proposed. He's wealthy."

"I taught her well!" He grins, raising his glass.

"I'll agree to that." Agil raises his empty one in return.

Klein pauses, taking on a quiet tone. "And Asuna?"

"I have a feeling that Yuuki replaced Kirito somewhere along the way." And he briefly recalls the girl. The way the wind felt at her funeral. How emaciated her body had been in the real world.

"That's too bad. For both of them."

The silence is causal and they sit in it comfortably. Agil watches him think, eyeing the slight fidget in his knuckles.

"So?" The older asks, inspecting the impeccably clean glass between thumb and index.

"So what?"

"He's been eighteen." Klein doesn't even look at him. His mouth is dry from the liquor and he stares despondently at the water.

"And I've been dating," he defends.

"With terrible success rates." The truth hurt.

"I haven't even considered all my options."

"Klein. I've been watching you struggle for two years. It's time to settle down."

"I'm not gay." He stakes his claim while staring the other directly in the eye. And Agil barely smiles at the ungrateful audacity which comes with intoxication.

"I never said you were."

* * *

He achieves a minor promotion at work and finally finishes his degree in engineering. An over-glorified folder with a piece of paper, decorated in twirly gold edging and fancy script. Agil slides him a drink and Asuna smiles so vividly as she hands him the ceremonial slice of cake.

He grins and scratches at the back of his neck, feeling more suffocated than grateful.

"This wasn't really necessary you guys!" He laughs off the slight embarrassment. His demeanor is unchanged and, in turn, the focus of the room is deterred from the very individual they celebrate.

Kirito twirls a fork absentmindedly. His eyes narrow and he scowls at the bar top. And he turns back at the sound of his name, smirking as Lizbeth dragged her fiancé into an introduction. The bustling of his group forces Klein to recall SAO. And his teeth grind noticeably at the simple memories. His blood would boil at the recollections. Every swing of the sword, every tactical maneuver. The way false dirt felt beneath his feet and the way death felt on the skin of his hands.

"Are you going to eat that?" Agil takes a forkful of his own, leaning back against the bar top. The sound his utensil makes against the blue porcelain of the plate sends a shiver through each finger. The feeling of food in this world will never be the same. And he nearly cringes at the textures as he swallows.

"Nah. I don't want to overindulge. Trying to watch my weight." Klein pats at his stomach triumphantly, as though the work were paying off. And Agil takes every glass of liquor he's consumed in the last three months into consideration.

"Ah. Can't eat anything we want anymore, can we?" The two smile, a subtle tension stiffening their limbs.

"It's hard to remember." But it's difficult to forget. And he wonders just how stuck they all are. How disturbed and unnerved they stand, torn between two worlds that were both beyond them. Unable to fully adapt to either. As though in purgatory.

Agil sees the haunted stare. Recognizes the look he's worn in the mirror a dozen times.

"Klein." He looks at Asuna as she folds her hands at her front, approaching his side at the bar. She's leaning forward energetically. But her eyes are lackluster as she stands up straight, and it bothers him immensely.

"Agil, can I have a moment?" He smirks, setting down his plate, and takes a step to the side, intending to interrogate Lisbeth's fiancé. She seems to exhale at their privacy, as though anxious.

"What's wrong, Asuna?" She glances about her, eyeing their companions as though this were a secret. Her lips part and he can tell they're dry.

"I never thanked you. For bringing us back."

"What are you talking about?" He grins and rubs at the base of his head. He knocks his foot at the bar rhythmically, scuffing the wood.

"The item of rejuvenation. On the 78th floor." She smiles at him, eyes reflecting the slight gold that Kirito could go on about for hours. Her voice was hushed, if only out of contemplation.

There's a silence before he finally finds the words.

"It was nothing." He stares into his plate, disinterested.

" _Healthcliff_." The name resonates eerily. It sticks to the air like the stench of death. He scowls, looking at the rim of his glass and the little strawberry atop the slice of cake. She says she made it herself.

The laughter of an old friend breaks the silence. He feels the tenderness of his palm where his own nails dug deep.

"Mmh." He stares onward.

"But it wasn't for me. I know that." She bites into her bottom lip, fingers clenching and unclenching. He looks at her, hands gripping the glass a bit too tight. She places a somber set of fingertips on her right shoulder, grasping at the nonexistent camera she'd longed to feel. And the brief beginnings of tears dab at the small edges of her eyes. His heart breaks for her, if only slightly.

"I wouldn't mind. You and him." She's looking at him, watching Kirito's every movement from her place beside Klein. She closes her eyes into a soft smile. His throat is dry. He takes a rushed sip of his drink and finds that gin only worsens the feeling. He doesn't look at her for a very long moment...and when he does, she's composed herself.

"Not a bit," she says. But he knows it's more self-reassuring. And he knows that it all hurts. The pain is the same in the other world. It's the only thing that carries on in reality.

Asuna walks away, and Klein takes a bite of his cake.


End file.
